It's STILL DRYUARY Mini-Series: You're Not Alone if this feels HARD
This is the alcohol minimalist podcast. And this is a special series. It's still dry you Arey. I'm your host, Molly watts. Let's get started. Hey, hey, welcome to the alcohol minimalist mini series. It's still dry you weary? Are you excited for this week I am, I will be sharing five daily mini episodes, many being a relative term, they will be shorter than my typical episodes, but longer than a couple of minutes just to set your expectations correctly. And it is my hope that tuning in every day this week will help you navigate the messy middle of the month and reinvigorate you to stay on whatever dry ish damp, totally dry January plan that you have in place, you can absolutely make great progress. Still this month, even if you've had Off Plan drinks, even if you're feeling like the end of the month is a long way off. And it's all about your mindset. And that's what we will be talking about this week. Before we get there, I do want to let you know that there are a ton of free resources. over on my website, you can go there, Molly watts.com. And a couple in particular that you won't just find on the website, you got to put in the actual URL. The first one is the podcast listening guide. I created this because I've got a pretty big catalogue of podcasts now. And if you're just finding this podcast, you may want some direction on what to listen to first. So that's what the podcast listening guide is for. And you can pick it up at Molly watts.com/listen. That's Molly watts.com/listen. Obviously, www top Molly watts.com. The other one I announced last week, a series that I'm doing all around this mini series about alcohol core beliefs, your alcohol core beliefs, what are they they are what drives your desire to drink. They are the unconscious stories, the things that are going on behind the scenes in your brain that are fueling your desire to drink. And I've created a mindmap about those. So again, you won't see it over on the website unless you put in the URL. It's Molly watts.com/mind. Map, other free resources over there. So check it out. And if you're looking for some extra support on getting you through dry January or in creating a new relationship with alcohol, I think they could be useful for you. So hey, did you know that last Friday, January 12, is known as international quitters day. That's right, because it is the most likely day for people to give up on their New Year's resolutions. Research conducted by Strava, which is a social network for athletes, discovered that the second Friday in January was the fateful day when most quitters motivation begins to falter. By analyzing over 31 point 5 million global January activities Strava was able to pinpoint the second Friday in January as international quitters day. Now I am not sure what that says about behavior change or human nature. Other than if you're finding your motivation to stick to your dry January goals laning you are certainly not alone. And that's exactly what we're gonna be talking about on this episode of The miniseries. Number one this episode is you're not alone if this feels hard. And even though dry January has become more popular, it has become more socially acceptable for sure. And there are a prolific number of non alcoholic options out there that are widely available. That doesn't mean that it's just automatically easy for people to change their drinking habits. And when it comes to alcohol specifically as opposed to other resolutions. When people find it difficult to abstain or cut back. Often thoughts turn to Does this mean I have a problem with alcohol? You know, for example, am I an alcoholic? And those thoughts fuel feelings of anxiety, doubt, insecurity. Those kinds of negative emotions are what many habit drinkers are used to buffering away with alcohol. So yes, as paradoxical as it might sound, even if you haven't had an Off Plan, drink during dry you're weary yet. If you're questioning the fact that it feels hard, you may be unconsciously fueling your does I have to drink. And I like to say a phrase, don't add to your suffering with my own thoughts I tell myself all the time. And I'll explain what I mean by that. Because it doesn't mean that abstaining during dry you weary is a form of suffering. But we'll talk about what it means to add to your suffering with your own thinking. With regard to it feeling hard to stick to our dry you weary plans, we should not be surprised that it's not getting a whole lot easier by mid January. And I think that's what many of you believe should be happening, right? Just because it feels hard. That doesn't mean that you've lost your resolve that you're not motivated to do this. And it certainly does not mean that you have a problem with alcohol, quote, unquote. Social drinking is a routine for many people. And breaking that pattern is difficult, you can blame it on your beautiful, brilliant human human brain. Now, if you've developed a habit system for alcohol, which many people have, then your responses become very automatic, our lower brain has committed drinking to habit. And we have to actively inhibit that habit system by tapping into our higher more logical prefrontal cortex to override it. Even when you've decided that it's dry January, and you're not going to drink during the month, the habit system is still there. And in order to keep with your resolution, you will have to override it every time you would normally be drinking. Now, yes, it gets easier over time when we've built new neural pathways, and we've practiced our new behaviors and our new thoughts repeatedly, but you're setting yourself up for disappointment. If you don't expect your lower brain automatic responses to be happening during dry you weary. During the course of the month, many of you will focus your attention on the action of drinking, you'll try to control the habit triggers of time and place and possibly avoid situations where you would typically be drinking. And that's a short term strategy that can definitely help you avoid those automatic habit type responses. If going out to dinner tempts you to drink, then sure, skip it. If there are people that you tend to drink with, I guess skip them. If you're gonna be tempted by having alcohol in the house, open or not, then sure remove it altogether. These avoidance type strategies are just that they are strategies they are tactics, they are short, short term solutions, right to sticking to your New Year's resolutions, or sticking to dry January. Many people will also look to substitute a behavior, right? That could mean swapping alcohol for juice or some non alcoholic version of your drink. It could also mean that you plan activities that do not involve drinking. And both of these strategies avoiding and substituting will definitely help you steer clear of automatic triggers and they aren't a bad idea. I'm not suggesting that at all. Let's get back to the feeling of dry you weary is hard. What are you making that feeling mean? This is what I meant when I said earlier don't add to your suffering. The fact that dry away feels hard, it feels hard because of your thoughts. It will feel less hard if you expect to be uncomfortable. And if you don't make the fact that you're tempted to drink Off Plan mean anything other than your beautiful, brilliant human brain doing exactly what it evolved to do. If you add to your suffering with thoughts that fuel anxiety, insecurity and doubt, you will also likely fuel the feeling of desire for alcohol. Especially if you've got a habit system for alcohol that goes beyond time and place triggers. I know for myself, that was certainly true. In addition to being an automatic every day after work drinker, I absolutely created a habit of using alcohol to buffer away negative emotions. It's why I say all the time that creating sustainable change is all about becoming a better Mind Manager being a better thinker. Practice this thought and see if it doesn't help you feel better about how hard dry you were. He feels tell yourself it's totally normal. That dry you airy feels hard, because I've got a beautiful, brilliant human brain that I've trained to desire alcohol automatically, and it will take time and intention to rewire it. normalizing our feelings neutralizing our thoughts works wonders. So do that instead. Out of adding to your suffering, right? If you are interested in making this month long reset a sustainable change, I would love to invite you to learn more about how I work with people. I'm really excited to announce that this year in 2024, I have added a 12. Week one on one coaching program. This is limited because just due to my own time capacity, so if you are wanting a high touch direct access coaching opportunity, then you'll definitely want to check it out. And I'd say do it sooner rather than later because it will absolutely sell out. I work with people in three ways. And you can learn all about all of them over on the website, www dot Molly watts.com/work with me, or if you'd like to go a little deeper as some questions, see a little bit behind the scenes then shoot me an email Molly at Molly watts.com. And let's jump on a call. We will decide together what might work best for you. All right, that's all I have for you today. Tomorrow we will be talking about the witching hours and why your motivation can feel so strong in the morning and then completely disappear around 5pm Until then, choose peace my friends
